Despite the fact that I have not yet begun a countdown, I am ever-aware of the fact that the time is flying by. The comfort of knowing that I had months to go has quickly turned into excitement and apprehension for what's to come. And I must admit that the reality of it all hasn't actually sunk in yet.
Today I gave my boss notice of my last day. And this week or next, I will finish up with the English tutoring that I have been doing. Slowly but surely, all of these chapters are closing, and I can't wait to see what new ones will fill their places.
Everyone asks, "Are you excited?!" Well, yes, I am! Most nights I lie awake, and my mind wanders as I think about the places I will go, the people I will meet, and the adventures that await me. And then, some nights, I think about the fact that I won't be home for Christmas, that I'm leaving everyone I love, that I don't know when I'm coming home, and I feel anxious and wonder if I'm crazy for doing this. It's a constant tension, and I know that I've felt it before. It will get better once I begin to establish myself there, but it won't go away completely. I know that this year will be filled with unforgettable experiences and new challenges... and I'm game for all of it. I've done it before, and I know I can do it again. It's a bigger risk, but that just means that I'm in for an even more rewarding experience (hopefully).
So, as the days are quickly passing, the excitement is getting even more exciting, and the apprehension is making me even more apprehensive. And before we know it, the day will be here, bringing with it a boatload of tears (I'm sure), and then I'll take off to finally begin this journey that I've waited so long to begin. It will be bittersweet - but mostly sweet.
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