good days

Today was a pretty good day.

What constitutes a good day? A lot of conversation, I think. I always feel good after a chatty day.

I read something recently that said, in more words or less, that to learn a second language you cannot be shy and you cannot be afraid to make a mistake. That's interesting to think about, because in my first language, I would define myself as a somewhat shy and cautious person. So it's funny to think that, in order to learn this second language, the most important thing is that I get over myself.
And I think that's true. When I stop being guarded and just start talking, I always feel better. When I attempt to say what I actually think, even if I don't know a word or two, my point always gets across.
I feel like so much effort is spent listening to others and trying to make sure that I'm understanding their conversations, that I don't even have time to think about what I can add to the conversation. I've been feeling lately like my coworkers don't really even know me. I mean, they know that I'm American and what not, but they don't really know me. I feel like I need to be better about sharing stories and letting people know who I am. I guess that's just something that will take time though.

The other day I was just sitting in the teacher's lounge, doing nothing, when one of the teachers said:
"Are you boring?"
"Am I boring? Well, I don't think so. But I am bored," I replied.
He was a little embarrassed as I clarified the difference between what he actually asked and what he meant to ask. But I couldn't help but wonder if, in reality, they really do think I'm boring.
Let's face it, I'm just not good at small talk. Not in English, not in Spanish.... but especially not in Spanish.

So, anyway, it's a good day when I can be a little chatty. It's a good day when I can start a conversation. It's a good day when I can join into a conversation between others.

Also, it's a good day when people bring in delicious treats to celebrate their birthdays. And it's a good day when I FINALLY GET PAID! And it's a good day when I finally get my medical insurance card.

In other, unrelated news, I have a new roommate. She is American. Now it's 4 against 2.
I got an email asking if any of us auxiliares knew of a place to live in el casco, and coincidentally, one of my roommates moved out the same week. I feel like it was the least I could do to help another auxiliar out. I know how stressed I felt when I first got here, trying to find housing and figure out how to live here. So I'm trying to be the help that I wish I would have had! In some ways, it's comforting to have another American here. It's like I'm no longer the only one being swallowed up in a sea of Spanish... I'm no longer a novelty. The only problem is that I am now speaking English in the one place that I couldn't speak English before, my piso. I really need to work on speaking Spanish more.

But hopefully I'll be able to continue being a chatty Cathy at school.